The Attack of the D Battery

Guest Blogger #2

By: Superman

A few days ago as I soared over the CVE campus Jenna hailed me from my position in the sky to come and aid her. The conversation is as follows.

Jenna: "Superman, there is something making noise in the little boys bathroom that I'm scared may come out at night and kill the boys. Will you please sacrifice yourself in order to find out what it is?"

Me: "Sure, Jenna. I'm willing to do whatever it takes to keep people safe around here."

Jenna: "Well, it is something that is poisonous and has fangs and claws. Unfortunantly all I have for you to protect yourself with is this paint stirrer. Since you are an amazing fighter and part tiger you should be fine."


So I proceeded to enter the house and search out the strange noise. After only seconds of being inside the little boy's bedroom I heard the noise that had spread fear through all living in that house. I heard the heart stopping, blood pumping, hair raising, fingernail biting, screech of.... the thing! So I searched low and high until I found a trap door leading into the ceiling. Grabbing a chair to stand on I peak my head into the gaping black abyss of the ceiling above only to hear the piercing scream again. This time it was closer to my head. As I turn around and look on the top shelf behind me I see the culprit that had been imposing fear on all the ladies. It was a smoke detector with a low battery. I calmly removed the battery disabling the detector from ever inflicting such terror in the house again. As I refused payment of jewels, food, and raiment I replied, "It's nothing that any normal hero wouldn't do."